aries: come at me scrublord im fuckin ripped
taurus: (takes you to McDonald’s just to tell you how much they McFreakin love you)
gemini: (hands u a note saying ‘my ass’)
cancer: hey wanna hold hands? (holds ur hand, immediately slams it down on the table) IM THE ARM WRESTLING CHAMPION
leo: if i was a dog, i would wag my tail whenever i saw you
virgo: (wakes up one day with you as the first thought in their mind) …… wtf
libra: i love you………..tube videos of cats do you wanna watch one with me?
scorpio: (holds your hand) this better be clean
sagittarius: i thirst-followed you, and it was the best decision of my life ❤
capricorn: you are the least terrible person I know
aquarius: (sends u a meme saying 'u meme the world to me')
pisces: (confesses in the snow while shooting stars fly overhead. immediately hands u a binder reading 'wedding plans')