When you don’t think you have a chance so you friendzone yourself
this post emits a strong gay culture vibe
life is hard when you’re shy and just below average looking
This was too good for me to not scream into the void about. I’m listening to this podcast rn and it’s quite frankly a gold mine. These have definitely been my favorite lines so far
(Also this is definitely not safe for work so it’s going under a read more)
“private pussy area”
“belinda’s breasts plunged to freedom and her nipples immediately stood to attention”
“her shaven pussy was revealed”
“spread your legs…so we get a good look at your internal attributes”
“her vaginal lids popped open” (Yikes™)
“her labial pinkness”
“teething her nipples vigorously”
~And thus concludes the TED Talk
*blasts 80’s music into ears* this is how I want to die
me, with tears in my eyes: time to make a joke
“Do you have any special skills?”
I can turn a simple task into a month long cycle of procrastination and disappointment
Tiffany Haddish getting drunk and telling the story of Rose Valland, an art curator who recovered stolen art from the Nazis during WWII, is everything I’ve never thought I needed in life. Someone PLEASE make this a regular thing with her. I guarantee our children and we, as a society, would learn more from her valuable teachings. [Full video here]
BEST SHIT EVER !!
i cant believe americans on tv really say rock paper scissors like???? its paper scissors rock omg do u irl americans actually say rock paper scissors????
rb this with whether u say paper scissors rock or rock paper scissors
me normally: linguistic differences are so interesting and cool! I love hearing different dialectal variations.
me, reading “paper, scissors, rock” with my own two eyeballs: the lord is testing me
me @ gates of heaven: i mean i wasn’t even that bad tho
god: *pulls out receipts*
god: sweetie 🙂
guess who is single and ready to
inject myself in with fictional worlds and characters because I crave intimacy and adventure but I have too much anxiety and too few social skills to form bonds with real people and achieve this dream
synnatra 